What if I lost it. What if I went completely berserk and spoke without thinking. What if I knew no hurt and experienced no pain, what if I lived a life worth living not a sheltered one. What if I spoke with bitterness towards the bitter ones, what if I used soft words towards the ones who hurt me most. What if I said what I really wanted to say and cared less about other’s opinions. What if I became a hunter and chased you down until you gave in. What if I didn’t take no as an answer and pursued forcefully.
Fuck, what am I turning into? I’m turning into a hermit with no shell. I’m turning into a person with worries about everyone and everything. I think I’m growing up at a pace faster than I can follow.
I didn’t even try and I give up, I was right all along. A male of his worth is unreachable, how I could’ve possibly think I could obtain his affection I don’t know. This is just infatuation; he is wonderful because he is rare. A gem that shines a bit to brightly for my eyes.
I am lovely. Even with smears cast across my life story. One day, I will share me with somebody, someone marvelous. Somebody indescribable, a person worth calling a friend.
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